Category Archives: Life

Party II

It was a much quieter affair than the last one. But it was still good!

~ Making Sushi
~ made sushi

Russian Cocaine
Russian cocaine was served in abundance

1st Hamish
First Hamish of the night

Hamish poster
The drink’s creator attended in A4 poster form

Nada
Nada came all the way from New Jersey – what’s your excuse? – only to be strangled by ~ in a fit of paranoia. These things happen at Hagakure parties

Johana
Former Operative Johana (Hamish)

Li & Reanimator
Former Operatives Reanimator (Scotch & Cola) and Li (rightly hiding in shame behind bottle of Cascade Light)

Semi
Semi (herbal tea and sympathy)

T.
T. (fat rocks of crack, not shown)

Dorothy
Some woman dressed as Dorothy from The Wizard of Oz (not sure what she was on)

Gogo
This crazy Japanese girl gave ~ a terrible time a while back, but he invited her anyway.

Reanimator, Li, ~, a russian mathematician and i ended up watching Fight Club by candlelight at about 3am. I did loads of bulbs.

It was good.

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Filed under Current Affairs, Domestica, Drugs, Drunkenness, Evil, Life, People, Photos, Pimpage, w0ot

Recent Correspondence

From: Trysting Fields Central Communications
To: JoBean
Date: 8 November 2006 10:45:32 PM

> 😀  I have enough trouble coming up with my own posts, m’dear.
> And you want me think of topics for you as well?

You seem to be doing okay.. slow but not short of content

> How about the fact that I went into a pet shop the other day and saw
> me some kittens.

You want me to post on *my* blog about what *you’ve* been up to? Tript‘s right.

> Yay kitten season!  

Yay! I saw two cats fucking for the first time ever the other night; it was well surreal and shit

Everything is surreal at the moment; I blame the racing carnival

I was saying to LJ this morning: the streets are filled with outrageously drunk women in slutty dresses and ridiculous hats; singing, getting into fights, throwing up, falling over

At all hours of the day and night

No one bats an eye, that’s standard in Melbourne at this time of year

Freewheeling, zany-ass city that we are

I was trying to sell Melbourne to her

Do you think that will work?

> You should call  those places again if you  want  one  😀

Thanks for the tip 😛

heh

But too busy! Too busy!

I have to catch up on Adam’s blog too, I haven’t read it for ages and ages and ages; his posts are gold but they’re too long

So much to do! So little weed. Indeed none at all; it’s becoming unacceptable

Get it sorted, “Johana”

Honestly, sometimes I wonder why we are still friends

You never send me flowers, you never have any weed when *I* need it

We may have to see about your license to practice if this whack continues

Much love,

T

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Filed under Current Affairs, Desperation, Drugs, Heh, Life, People, Weblogs, Whack

Life Is Good

nb clever peripheral utilization may or may not reveal secret hidden messages

Have a good look at yourself.! courtesy of Souvlaki King. No charge - real decent of them

Best steak sanger in Melbourne to boot, reckons Els; good to be seeing her back again

Faux-Red Bull Coke Zero I felt strangely compelled to buy

Steve Cronin sent this to me; he's basically good, I like him

In retrospect, some obscure shoutout significance may be read into the uncharacteristic choice of variety, but sometimes a pizza is just a pizza. Everybody basically understands pizza

Life is good.

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Filed under Art, Benevolence, Current Affairs, Damage Control, Dreams, Drugs, Food, Genius, Heh, Illusion Of Time, Life, Life Is Good, Movies, Music, Night Time, Photos, Self Analysis, w0ot

Party

It went off.

Frontage

Beer

Wrong shirt
~ tried to persuade me to wear this shirt of his, but it was the wrong shirt

Discombobulatorary mobile
He also prepared a special discombobulatory mobile for the back garden

American Guy
The first of my guests to arrive was none other than former operative American Guy. Sadly he didn’t stay very long, but it was nice to see him again

Semi, T & ~
Semi’s bitch good friend T (pictured, centre), a brilliant and profoundly disturbed young man, spent the first two hours or so of his tenure focussed with laser-like intensity on the task of building us a better stereo from found objects, including my dodgy $60 DVD player

Improvised stereo

Russian cocaine
He then proceeded to introduce the company to the seductive pleasures of Russian Cocaine (shot of vodka–> lemon wedge with white sugar on one side and ground – nb not instant – coffee on the other. Try it, you will like it)

Jo's skirt
Queen Jo was very proud of her skirt, and rightly so. Disappointed I didn’t get any better pictures of it

Red Bull concentrate

Red Bull concentrate shot CU
One bottle of the red bull concentrate was consumed between several individuals, albiet not under experimentally pure conditions

In other news, Desci was good enough to bring her last packet of NO bulbs. To my astonishment, neither she nor Semi had ever even heard of doing them from balloons. And to my dismay, I didn’t have any. They were still great though. Nitrous Oxide, children.

Aftermath 1

Empties

Aftermath 2

Curry on Brunny
After cleaning up a bit on Sunday, we went out for breakfast. But completely outrageously, there apparently isn’t anywhere on Brunswick Street that does breakfast after 6pm. Huge gap in the market. We had to settle for curry

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Filed under Drunkenness, Life, People, Photos, w0ot

Second Twenties

Got it? Second twenties.

I made a right mess of my first twenties.

They were a learning experience. *shrugs*

I learned a lot.

Having given the matter some considerable thought, I’ve decided to take them again.

(NB Do not argue.)

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Filed under History, Illusion Of Time, Life

Stuff I Did This Week


Kitchen    Dining room    Hallway    Laundry    Bathroom

– Exhaustively cleaned the kitchen, the dining room, the hallway, the laundry, and the bathroom.

Position description

– Made sixteen phonecalls, took seven phonecalls, attended interviews with three people, and lodged one detailed & tedious application form in pursuit of new revenue streams. Ate dodgy Japanese food on Chapel Street; gawped at people hanging on Chapel Street.

Bentendo's new place (ext)

– Visited Bentendo at his new place.

Bentendo's invisible view

He has a very nice view of the city, which I was unable to photograph for security reasons

Prepaid SIM card

– Reincarnated my old mobile – which I thought I’d lost, eventually replaced, and later found – as a second phone, via the purchase of a $25 prepaid SIM card.

Updating contacts

– Updated my address book and phone contacts.

Bathroom tile situation

– Succesfully enticed a professional tiler into assessing dire bathroom tile issue situation, pictured. (They refused to replace the tiles, arguing that the only meaningful solution was to retile the whole bathroom.)

Harira blogpost

– Made an elaborate pictoral blog post about cooking harira.

Region unlockage

– Inspired by trawling my own blog archives, figured out how to region-unlock my DVD player.

Birthday card

– Made a disastrous birthday card.

Stuff for the cat

– Stupidly trammed it all the way out to the RSPCA in Burwood East to buy a kitten, only to discover that – it not quite being kitten season yet, see – they didn’t have any. (Note to self: next time ring ahead.)

Jo & Xade

– Got shitfaced at The Mint and elsewhere again with Jo, Xade, Rorschach, Jaye deKoan and sundry others. An unshaven Tript was vaguely encountered somewhere in the vicinity of the Victoria Markets at around 1am. About two people at least one of whom I did not previously know ended up on my foldout couch watching Reservoir Dogs.

Guitar

– Recorded a cover of Always On My Mind with my associate Mishuki One for H419.

Photos of stuff I did this week, on Flickr

– Made an elaborate pictoral blog post about things I did this week.

– Watched entire series of John Safran vs God (purchased secondhand last Sunday for $5).

– Went to the gym five times.

– Wrote 36 emails to 15 people.

– Et cetera.

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Filed under Current Affairs, Domestica, Drunkenness, Life, Movies, Music, People, Photos, Work

My Housemate’s Stuff Is All Packed In Boxes

Boxes

He, and his little brother, are moving out next Saturday.

Soon all of this:

Dining-bedroom

.. will be just a distant memory.

Espresso machine

And they’re leaving me the espresso machine! Score.

Bucket of coffee

I think a party may finally be in order.

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Filed under Domestica, Life, Photos, Whack

Ambitions, Revisited

Last July I posted a list of ambitions.

Time for a review.

  1. To work in a streetcorner newsbooth.
  2. Partly a joke – but I’d still quite like to do this. I suspect they’re basically owner-operator kind of deals, though. Gonna look into it this week.

  3. To become a cult leader by rising to the front ranks of Neurocam and then either taking it over, or creating a sizeable splinter group.
  4. Done. I became the head of Neurocam last August (and was subsequently deposed in November). Being a cult leader was fucking cool, if extremely intense and an insane amount of work. I want to be one again some day, in some form. It suited me nicely.

  5. To write a throwaway novel (“which I am doing in November“).
  6. As things turned out, I was too busy fulfilling ambition no 2 to do this last November. So I’ll do it this November.

  7. To make an album, provisionally entitled ‘Everyone’s Too Stupid (“which I will do next year when I have more time”).
  8. A change in outlook has seen this one deprioritised – although I might still release a compilation of Mishuki One‘s recordings for Hagakure 419 under said title, if a sufficient number of them accumulate.

  9. To study for and obtain a degree in Creative Arts from Melbourne’s premier university (“guaranteeing me a colourful and lucrative subsequent career as a Creative Artist”).
  10. I intend to begin persuing this one next year. Unless my career takes off stratospherically between now and then, of course.

  11. To finish reading “The Magus” by John Fowles, and then to ritually burn it.
  12. Done.

  13. To have fun and not care about people.
  14. To be beautiful.
  15. To be loved.
  16. Realisation of these three remain works in progress, although great strides have been made (admittedly, in some cases, made then lost) on all fronts.

Material things I wanted:
  • An umbrella.
  • Acquired.

  • A preamping device for my microphone.
  • Latterly I’ve been using my soon-to-be ex-housemate’s guitar pedals for this purpose. But they’ve stopped working – I think because the audio-in jack on my eMac is fucked. (Along with several of the USB ports.) But – see above – evolved approaches have rendered this less important than it used to be.

  • A Bigpond Movies membership.
  • With a Blockbuster just down the road, this has become less desirable. Although I would like to join ACMI, whose lending collection goes places theirs, frankly, doesn’t.

  • A region-free DVD player.
  • Acquired. (It isn’t really region free. But it’s okay.)

  • A better camera.
  • Acquired.

  • Peter Greenaway DVDs.
  • Some still pending, some acquired. In one case acquired (see previous link), then rendered unplayable due to careless handling.

  • See also: Amazon wishlist.
  • Note: the DVDs on this list are for reference only – although I know you’d love to buy them for me, I’m better off with locally-purchased Region 4s (see above).

Updated want list:
  • More driving lessons.
  • I started learning to drive in March last year, but stopped in September, due to being too busy & stressed. I’m no longer too busy/stressed, but I am too poor. Shall recommence when it becomes viable.

  • A cat.
  • Once my domestic arrangement stabilizes somewhat – and again, given sufficiently consistent income.

  • New trainers.
  • Soles of my current trainers:
    Worn out trainer soles

  • iPod Mini repair.
  • I bought a little 512mb Shuffle after my 4GB Mini broke for the second time late last year. At around $150 this was a substantially cheaper option than getting the Mini fixed. At this rate I will be able to get a Nano for less than the cost of getting the Mini fixed. In any case, I miss my Mini.
We’ll see what happens.

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Filed under Art, History, Life, Neurocam, Self Analysis, Work

Cactus VII

Cactus ingested

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Filed under Art, Death, Dreams, Life, Photos

A Solitary Cupboard Is All Very Well

But one tires of it.

Which is partly why I am moving next month, to the house in Fitzroy I was minding for a period last year.

Moving boxes

I’m excited!

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Filed under Domestica, Life, Photos

Sydney

My trip to Sydney the other weekend went well.

I like Sydney. (There, I said it.)

Saturday

Bus (day)

Bus (night)

I travelled by bus because it was $70 cheaper than flying. This was a mistake

Sunday

Pigeons in park

I arrived about 8am on Sunday morning, and wandered around looking dazedly at the pigeons in that park across from the bus depot whose name I can never remember. Someone somehow scabbed a lit cigarette out of my hand whilst I was talking on the phone

Bus to Newtown

Then got a bus to Newtown, where I was staying with baby sis (the trains were broken)

Porccini

She met me at this cafe across from the station. Several witnesses will confirm my version of events

Yellow house

She is living in a pretty yellow house

Zanzibar tapas

We hung out for a bit. I had a nap. Then we went down to her local, which is called ‘Zanzibar’. She seems to like it there. She had a voucher for free tapas, pictured

Fatimas

Then I went out to to dinner at a Lebanese restaurant in Surrey Hills, because it was someone’s birthday

Goggles

After dinner we went back to my friend whose birthday it was’s house and she showed us some of her birthday presents

Beer & cigs (flash)

Beer & cigs (sans flash)

Upon returning to the yellow house, sis’s housemates informed me that she was still at Zanzibar so I went up & joined her there

Breasts

We met an incredibly fucked up chick – we’ll her ‘Rhiannon’ – who, in between frequent trips to what she referred to as the ‘refreshment lounge’, insisted in very forceful terms that I take a picture of her breasts and post it to my blog

Kill Bill on balcony

After closing sis & I went back to the yellow house and watched Kill Bill vol. 2 on her baby iBook, sat out on her balcony. It was nice

Monday

A forecast trip to the beach in the morning was cancelled due to inclement weather so we just slept and hung around the house.

When it stopped raining in the afternoon we went out for coffee & food on King Street. Then I met my friend of the birthday at a Vietnamese restaurant down the road. She was a bit sad and I did not take a picture.

Hollywood Hotel

Once she’d finished her soup we caught a bus to the Hollywood Hotel where further gatherage had been arranged

Urinal (flash)

Urinal (sans flash)

Even the beautiful old-world porcelain fittings there could not stave off the dreaded urinal performance anxiety

At Hollywood

Baby sis (left) eventually joined us, partly I think because I told her there would be karaoke. We didn’t end up doing karaoke. I was kind of disappointed

ZanzibarToilet

The gathering dispersed and sis & I returned compasslike to Zanzibar, where I threw up. Unfortunately I forgot to take a picture until after flushing the lounge chair

Tuesday

Bus (evening)

Bus back to Melbourne. Slept, read, listened to music, and talked for way too long on the phone

That is all.

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Happy

Yay!

I’ve finally compiled my “Stuff I Did Last Year” post, which had become the object of increasingly dire procrastinatory enmirement over these past two weeks. It involved conducting a larger review of the year which I’d been dreading.

That was stupid of me. (Hindsight’s a wonderful thing.)

It may seem like I’ve been neglecting this blog – but the truth is I’ve been going half-demented thinking about what to do with it.

*sigh*

The only fly in my ointment today, however, is that I’ve accidentally deleted the audio file – which I really, really wanted to post – of a conversation conducted between myself and my neighbour on Thursday night.

We were discussing the most efficient way of killing everyone in our building. In the end we decided to get two pistols with a silencers and then just knock on each person’s door one by one. I would do upstairs, he would do downstairs. Simple, effective, no muss, no fuss.

The talks broke down, however, when it became apparent that my neighbour thought we should give ourselves up once the job was complete.

That seemed ridiculous to me. What kind of milksop goes on a merciless killing spree and then surrenders? “Gee, sorry about that. Here, let me spend the rest of my life in jail”? Fuck that.

I’m going to Sydney tonight, for the birthday of an old friend and to hang with baby sis, who is going backpacking overseas next month for a long time. I shall return on Tuesday evening. There will be pictures.

But then, once I get home, I’ll be working like a trojan through to Sunday. So don’t be anticipating too much action round these parts over the next week or so.

There are going to be changes. Good changes. Still not sure exactly what form they’ll take yet. But they’ll be good.

Finally, word up as always to all the good people I’ve been woefully neglecting in various ways of late (specifically: Agent Blabber, Alexis, Clover, Desci, Hits, Li, Nada, Reanimator, Simon Blackmoore and the mysterious, oracular Mr Simon Moon.. although somehow I feel sure that he, at least, is not offended).

Please be assured of my regard and that communques are pending as applicable.

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Filed under Life, People, Weblogs, Whack, Work

Schedule 1

Schedule 2

Schedule 3

Schedule 4

Schedule 5

Schedule 6

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Filed under Art, Life

Stuff I Did This Year

– Lived a first full year in Melbourne, having migrated from my native Canberra in November 2004.

– Endured one month at Melbourne Uni before melting down and dropping out to become a fulltime disumbrationist, weblog administrator and Neurocam operative, amongst other things.

– Gave away approximately 1180 hours of my life to various people I don’t know and couldn’t give a shit about in exchange for money.

– Kept two blogs, totalling some 56,800 words:

  • Wrote 747,100 words of email to approximately 80 recipients.
  • Acquired my first domain name.
  • Started taking digital photos, saving 1178 (of which I uploaded 280 to Flickr. 80 of these, I discover to my disappointment, are no longer indexed – although they’re still there).
  • Qualified for my Ls and spent about 40 hours learning to drive.
  • Spent approximately 150 hours at the gym.
  • Created six semiautonomous people, of whom one remains alive, and five of whom are dead – including Henry Gagblat and the deeply unfortunate Ms. Gethsemane Nash, both of whom committed suicide (losers).
  • Had considerable dealings with the organisation known to the public as Neurocam International.
  • Read an astonishingly pitiful four books from beginning to end, and watched 46 movies (18 at the cinema and 28 on video & DVD).
  • Amongst other things.

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    Filed under Life

    Wedding (finally)

    Welcome back. Things have been crazy.

    So, my sister’s much-anticipated wedding finally happened on Saturday the 17th. The whole family came to town. It was pretty full on. The event was roundly deemed a success.

    A substantial number of pictures were taken.

    Friday

    Coffeeage in courtyard

    Hangin with the fam

    Cake

    Tooling the cake

    Surveying the site

    Surveying the site

    Surveying the site

    Buying clothes

    Emergency clothes shopping

    Beers with Ben

    Beers with the visiting Bentendo at Bar With No Name (favoured haunt of Neurocam renegades Iocus Severus and Nikolay Kamchatka)

    Saturday

    Schedule

    Ceremony

    Applause

    Everyone applauded after the ceremony, which I found slighly strange but maybe that’s just me

    Lunch

    Lunch (as consumed on grass)

    Lunch was a picnicky affair

    Lunch (as consumed at table)

    Although some people weren’t down with that (which, y’know, is cool)

    Sammy is shy

    Sammy was quite intimidated by the whole thing initially

    Sam & baby

    Sammy excited

    But he got over it

    Speeches

    Despite persistent fears of rain, in the end it only spat slightly for a brief period during the speeches

    Boule rules

    Lawn games

    Lawn games were played

    Baby sis after lunch

    It was all pretty good

    Sunday

    Brunch invite

    Coffee at Retro

    Baby sis at brunch

    Post-nuptial brunchery at Retro on Brunswick Street

    Beers with baby sis

    Beers with baby sis. We also went and saw Good Night, & Good Luck at the Kino Dendy, because I always do everything Lady J tells me to

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    Filed under Life, Photos