Fish Sticks & Salad

(And cheap champagne.)

Fish sticks & salad

In homage to Lady J.

I would normally never eat fish sticks (actually, in Australia, we call them ‘fish fingers’) but my sister has about 80,000 of them in her freezer for some reason.

They must have been on sale.

10 Comments

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10 Responses to Fish Sticks & Salad

  1. We call them fingers here too.
    p.s is homage pronouned “oh-maage” or “hommidge”?

  2. Catboy: Always with the questions! (That’s okay, it’s good to have an enquiring mind.)
    I think it depends on how pretentious you are.

  3. i’m pretentious as fuck.
    …yeah i’m not sure what that means but i never swear so i thought i would.
    by the way, what’s the capitol city of Lait? Also, is there a country called Lait? Have I spelt it wrong? Do i smell funny? what smells funny? Where are you? what are you doing? why? why? why? wanna play poker? can you play poker? how about texas hold ems? do you know my friend sofie? did you know she’s on the phone right now? shall i see if she says hi?

  4. >what’s the capitol city of Lait?
    There is no country called Lait.
    >Also, is there a country called Lait?
    No.
    >Have I spelt it wrong?
    Since you invented it, no. But you did spell “capital” wrong.
    >Do i smell funny?
    Something does…
    >what smells funny?
    I think it might be the dog. Or maybe it’s me..
    >Where are you?
    In my sister’s study.
    >what are you doing?
    Answering your questions and injesting coffee in my dressing gown when I should be having a shower and getting ready to go to work.
    >why? why? why?
    Because it’s cold and I don’t want to go to work.
    >wanna play poker?
    Love to.
    >can you play poker?
    Alas no.
    >how about texas hold ems?
    *Looks at you quizically*
    >do you know my friend sofie?
    I did once know someone called Sofie but I doubt that this is the same one.
    >did you know she’s on the phone right now?
    I did not know that.
    >shall i see if she says hi?
    Yeah, that would be awesome.
    Anything else?

  5. PS Nice work on the swearing. It’s always nice to see a young man taking an interest in profanity.
    For extra bonus swearing points, try pairing your expletive with another offensive word, possibly shortened, to create a kind of portmanteau swear-bomb.
    Like this “fuck” + “retard” – “re” = “fucktard”.
    As in, “I’m a pretentious fucktard”.
    You can even make up your own swear words, by combining two words with unpleasant connotations into an exciting sweary-sounding neologism.
    eg “pus” + “wad” = “pusswad”.
    As in, “u shld seriously kill yrself pusswad. think about it.”
    My little sister sent this to me in a text message yesterday, after I told her I wanted to be Scarlett Johansson for my birthday.
    I’m sure she meant it affectionately.

  6. Also on the creative use of profnaity:
    A linguist friend of mine told me this years ago: While English has an abundance of prefixes and suffixes, the only known infix (as in, it fits into the middle of a word instead of the start or the end) is ‘fucking’.
    Examples:
    Q: “Should I ask out that hot girl I met last night?”
    A: “Abso-fucking-lutly!”
    Q: “How was that muffin?”
    A: (mumbled through a mouthful of crumbs) “De-fucking-licious!”
    Q: “What do you think of this posuer’s faux-literary pretensions?”
    A: (with a roll of the eyes) “In-fucking-credible!”
    Thus ends today’s grammar lesson.
    In other unrelated news: I seem to use quite a few colons.

  7. What a cunning linguist your friend is.
    I can’t think of any non-sweary infixes in English. But lots of sweary ones. You could also say, for example “un-cunting-believable” or “de-bastard-licious”, or any number of variants along those lines.

  8. Sofie said Hi and her choice of rude word was “cunt!” which, if anyone is interested, is the new number that comes between 4 and 5.

  9. This Sofie sounds like my kind of chick. You should introduce us.

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