The Feustus Memorial Fishtank Cleaning Post

The former fishtank of Feustus the goldfish was cleaned out yesterday in a short ceremony intended to symbolise both the sadness of loss and the consoling hope of renewal. The order of proceedings was as follows:


  1. The stagnating water once occupied by the departed was poured down the sink. As a gesture of respect, no photo was taken during this stage of the operation.
  2. Newly emptied fishtank on stove

  3. The newly deliquified fishtank was placed on the stove with its Christmas ribbon artfully draped off one side, and captured for posterity.
  4. This photo clearly shows the gravel in the otherwise empty fishtank

  5. An additional photograph was taken, emphasising the presence of the gravel in the fishtank.
  6. Gravel in special transitional receptacle

  7. The gravel was transferred transitionally to a large ceramic mixing bowl chosen especially for the purpose, and photographed in this new setting.
  8. The fishtank is carefully cleaned

  9. The fishtank was carefully cleaned using hot water and a new wettex, opened expressly for the ceremony and subsequently disposed of, with no regard to expense.
  10. The fishtank photographed undergoing ritual draining process

  11. The fishtank was placed on a draining rack and photographed once again.
  12. This photo clearly shows the gravel in the otherwise empty fishtank

  13. The gravel was returned to the fishtank.
  14. The triumphantly clean fishtank returned to its normal setting

  15. The tank was returned to its home on the bookshelf, to await the arrival of a new occupant. A final photograph was taken, marking the conclusion of the ceremony.

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