Man Lying On Road Hit By Car

In other news: *insert punchline here*

13 Comments

Filed under Current Affairs, The End Is Nigh, Whack

13 Responses to Man Lying On Road Hit By Car

  1. Honesty is the best policy?
    It’s the best I could think of.

  2. teigan

    >Honesty is the best policy?
    I was thinking more along the lines of “Man drinking poison poisoned”, “Man molesting lethal stingray stung to death” etc.
    Unless I’m missing something, your suggestion scores relatively low on both the comedy and relevance indices.
    But hey, thanks for trying. We can only do our best, ay

  3. A G

    The only thing better was that story that was all over the world press about a year and a half(?) ago – chronically ill and very old man dies.
    Of course, the way *they* spun it was: The pope is dead

  4. Ah, but he was a celebrity, see. So it was newsworthy.
    “Old Man Of No Particular Importance Dies” – funny headline.
    (“Study Reveals Old Age, Chronic Illness Death Link”, “Man Lying On Road Getting Run Over ‘No Coincidence’: Scientists”)
    “Pope dies” – not funny headline.
    Made me smile, but that was just me.
    Now, “Pope Lying On Road Hit By Car” – just don’t know about that one.
    Actually I do; that would be funny.

  5. But mine is a message of peace.
    Why can we all get along? That’s my headline. And what a headline it is too.

  6. teiggy nolastname

    It’s beautiful.
    Man Lying On Road Hit By Car. Hot flash: people are stupid. Buy our news.
    It’s not inherent, mind. It’s learned. People absorb their stupidity memetically from all the stupid people around them. And there’s a lot invested in the process. It’s a shame.
    Also, honesty isn’t the best policy. Well, maybe sometimes. But generally I’ve found credibility is a better policy than honesty. Whoever told you honesty is the best policy was probably trying to exploit you in some way.
    PPS I’m not a cynic, I’m an idealist.
    Yes, I am.

  7. jo

    I thought AG’s was funny. What are you the funny police?
    *Hands you a hat*
    at least look the part. 😛
    My entry would be –
    “Deaf girl didn’t hear train”
    about a year ago? 😛

  8. j

    My entry would be –
    “Deaf girl didn’t hear train”
    about a year ago? 😛

    nice recall!

  9. teiggy nolastname

    zomg, I had totally forgotten about Ms Deaf Texas.
    >What are you the funny police?
    Yup, I’m the funny police. I will decide what is funny according to me, on my blog. Deal.

  10. teiggy nolastname

    ps thanks for the hat; i will add it to my collection of hats

  11. You unpeaceful bastards.
    Fine, have your transport related accidents – I’m sorry I have to stop this sentence mid flow because I just bit into a piece of cheece and found a hair in it. In got stuck between my teeth like floss…
    I didn’t even know that could happen.
    What else could hairs be in!?

  12. Fuck, that really grossed me out…
    I finished the cheese though, that was delicious. Maybe the hair was the secret ingredient? I guess we’ll never really know.
    Not for sure.

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